The thing nobody talks about is how you’ll doubt yourself. Not just in romance but in all personal relationships. Do they really like me? Were they really not available to hang out? How much of what they just said is really the truth? They seem nice. But then I’m a horrible judge of that…right?
The thing nobody mentions is how it will hit you in the oddest moments and take the breath away from you. Walking along totally normal and BOOM you can’t breathe with the memories washing over you. It’s not gentle but like a ton of bricks weighing you down. Drowning you.
The thing nobody mentions is the length. How long it will be until you feel like yourself again.
The thing nobody mentions is how angry you’ll be at everyone. Friends, family, God. Why didn’t anybody warn you?
The thing nobody mentions is how angry you’ll be at yourself. Why didn’t you listen when the warnings came? Deep down you knew better but you didn’t listen to yourself. To your instincts.
The thing nobody mentions is how insecure you’ll feel. An insecurity that seems to seep into your bones and become a part of your DNA. You can’t remember a time when it wasn’t there. Time will pass and it will still be there. Whispering in your heart things you know are lies but still they sting.
The thing nobody mentions is that you’ll be able to fight through it. Scratching and clawing; gripping and digging in you’ll be able to move forward. Gaining an inch at time you’ll find who were you were before and who you’ll be now.
The thing nobody mentions is how tired the fight will make you. A bone crushing weariness that no amount of sleep can fix. You won’t remember a time when you weren’t tired. The strength will fly out of you quicker than you can replenish it.
But most of the all the thing that nobody mentions is how to get over it. Because there isn’t a path for that. There isn’t a way. One day you aren’t and the next day you just…are
And then the next day…you aren’t.
And the next day
And that’s the most frustratingly beautiful part of all.
Heartbreak can be like a sunset. There’s sadness the day is ending, but wow is it going out in the most gorgeous way imaginable. The ending of something can be hard and painful. But there can still be beauty in it. The night may be coming, but with it comes the stars. So just hold on. Enjoy the sunset.